When one isn't enough

With the recent news of the murder-suicide of ex-NFL star Steve "Air" McNair still fresh on the press, it forces us bloggers, media outlets and beauty salons all over the contiguous United States to address the age old subject of "cheating", or having an affair if you're married. More specifically, it brings up the question, "is one woman/man enough?".

The expectation is that when you're in a committed relationship/marriage that you are not entertaining the idea of another person of the opposite/same sex (depending on your sexual preference of course). So when you're married and have children and live a relatively public life, one might expect that you'd be a little more discreet with your non-marriage related carryings on. Not so. I think every woman wonders if her man ever cheated on her what type of woman would she be. Would she be smarter, prettier, sexier, freakier, more loving, a better listener, a better cook, more into sports....and on and on. But I bet Mrs. McNair never in a milli thought her former Titan would be romping around with a very adolescent looking Sahel Kazemi. WTF? A cheat is a cheat, tis true, but damn dude. The D&B server??? Really??

What a horrendous way for Mrs. Mechelle McNair to discover her husbands infidelity. Reports suggest that she had no knowledge of the affair, but I personally find that extremely hard to believe. There are pictures surfacing with Steve and Sahel Kazemi on a vacation. I'm talking about all boo'd up. He's all smiles and so is she. Not a damn care in the world. No concern or care if these pictures get out and his wife, family, kids sees them. Yeah, she knew, she just maybe didn't know who the chick was, but she had to know her man was out there doing something. But how sad and embarrassing. To get the news that your husband has been murdered and next to him is his jump-off who probably killed him. Whew...that's gotta take your breath away.
I think about the subject of in/fidelity a lot and I notice that we bind ourselves to situations that really doesn't fit us, or just isn't what we want. I am not anti-marriage, but I am never shocked when I hear that someone is cheating, divorcing or unhappy in their relationship/marriage. I have also been guilty of getting into relationships for the wrong reason only to have them dissolve later down the road. Here's my thoughts on marriage:

Marriage =/= Commitment
Marriage= Obligation

Even this doesn't account for the "change of heart" that seemingly happens after a few years of marriage. Call it marriage boredom, marriage routine, cheat itch or whatever. People start out with good intentions, but...as the saying goes, "the road to hell was built on good intentions". We all know examples of good intentions gone bad. Does anyone really set out to cheat? No, I doubt it but it happens, and it happens a lot.

There are so many men and women willing to be the "jump off" w/o any conditions that it makes the pathway a whole lot easier to walk towards. Add to that any little bit of celebrity, prestige, $$$, status, etc. then you got a situation. I'm intrigued by this love affair between McNair and Kazemi. The web says she worked at Dave & Busters where he and his FAMILY would often go. So the D&B chick got game...clearly. How did she approach Steve? Was his family present when she made her first move? What did she offer that his wife wasn't? Was she more fun, more freaky, a better listener, a better cook or was she simply a thrill; an adrenaline rush that his wife could no longer provide? Tons of questions, but we will never really know the answers.

Wow...Mrs. McNair is going to be distraught and perhaps relieved. Relieved if her husband was the philandering man that he's going to be remembered as, roaming about with some unknown woman until she was named as the second deceased person in his condo. Distraught b/c she has 4 kids to raise alone b/c her husband couldn't keep his dick in his pants, or cheat with a more sane individual. Either way, it's an ugly situation. This mess is all over the web and news. Tweets galore! What a way to go out.